It is that time of year again when everyone takes a good cold look at where we live, and start planning that time away somewhere warm. A couple of my friends have given me some ideas that I would like to share for those looking for an excuse or a destination. I will start with the excuse first.

Cape Town, South Africa:

Cape Town is a wonderful place for a vacation but also a great place to study. Cape Town is home to great English language schools like Quality English Interlink in Cape Town which provide for a great break from the Swedish winter, but also give a great opportunity for studying English and secure a better foundation in the language for employment or a university education abroad.

Argentina:

Argentina is a great get-away if you want to have a bit of the city and a bit of the beach. Buenos Aires is an amazing city filled with small restaurants, allies to explore and culture and recent history to add to the flavor. If you want to plan in some time at the beach, board one of the luxury coaches with fully reclining seats and head to the small resort town of Pinamar. This town is home to a beautiful pine forest that has grown into the white sand dunes that are just back from the beach. The sand roads lined with luxury villa rentals make a wonderful break from the snow back at home.

It is worth saying again, that the food and the coffee of this country are worth the trip regardless of what else you do there. It is very easy to get to with an easy 12 hour flight from Madrid and a palate for adventure.

Sydney Australia:

Nothing beats welcome the New Year coming from the Sydney Harbor with fireworks filling your view as you lie back on a beach towel in Dawes Point Park beneath the bridge. The warm climate, the even warmer people make for a stress free vacation.

The locals, with the visitors flocking after them, head to Bondi Beach for what they call a Sun burnt Christmas.  The sound of waves and the smell of surf really adds memory to your Christmas day.

Dinners along the harbor overlooking Opera House or a casual Christmas cruise full of turkey and Christmas pudding would be a distraction to what your family and friends have to endure in the Northern hemisphere.

Brunch:

Brunch is a classic in North America and I don’t feel that many people take advantage of brunch spots in the Stockholm area.  If you are looking for reviews of brunch restaurants in Stockholm, a group of expats have recently started a blog that reviews different brunch locations – find it at brunchstockholm.se.  I have recently asked the guys behind the site to start adding information about the family friendliness of the place.

Swimming:

There are some great swimming pools in the Stockholm area and a number of them have adventure sections for families.  If you live in Northern Stockholm, then my favorite is the community pool in Bro.  It is usually fairly quite, it has 2 slides, a big shallow children’s pool furnished with palm trees and water spouts and is great for kids of all ages – including babies.  Simple meals for kids and refreshments are available outside of the pool area.  Entrance for 2 adults and 2 kids is about 100 SEK.

Another pool that is perhaps more modern and other components that are missing from the pool in Bro is located in Upplands Väsby.   It is more expensive as the pool is private, but is a good alternative for those who do not want to take that far of a drive out of town.  Note: If you know of other pools, please contact me so I can add them to this post.

Kunliga Djurgården:

There is a lot to do down on Djurgården with kids of all ages and most are easy to walk between.  Everything from the amusement parks of Junibacken and Gröna Lund to the museums of Skansen (open air) and Moderna museet (the modern museum) can entertain a family in full.  If I were being perfectly honest, it seems that Stockholm lacks a little in these kinds of things to do with kids in Stockholm; it always seems that when we have guests come and visit, we generally hit the same spots for lack of other options.

Looking forward to the Summertime – The Sunny Outdoors:

Probably one of the most popular Swedish activities is being outside when the weather permits, and one of the best places to enjoy this weather is at one of the open air restaurants.  Visit Stockholm has a good list as does ArrivalGuides for Göteborg [Gothenborg]

If you have other things that could contribute to this list, please leave them in the comments below, or write me using the contact form so I can update this post.

I guess what is most important to note is that in putting managers in charge we are doing damage – making leaders from managers who believe they are engaged but in fact are the only ones excluded from the conversation questioning their methods.

Don’t worry, the team will not revolt because they feel like they are herded in the wrong direction, but instead look for ways, albeit quietly, to leave the team either mentally or physically.  The news flash here is that the team with not revolt because they are not really your team.  I see it everywhere, and perhaps by writing about it, it gives me a chance to understand it better and help others identify solutions.

It is actually quite sad to believe that a person working so hard is actually causing damage to the team.  These managers do work very hard.  It is what has gotten them to the position they are in and oftentimes that is irrefutable.  An issue arises when it comes to that little extra that makes a manager a leader, that something, that feeling of how to engage with people they fail – like baking bread with dead yeast.  You can try and try, but it fails because of something you cannot fully control.

What makes a leader?

Leaders are a special breed of people – more an honest friend than anything else.  An honest friend is one who I can trust the opinion of; someone who is going to tell me how they feel, give me equal ownership of the friendship, and someone that by choice I want to befriend.

This issue of trust is paramount.  How can we be friends with someone we are unable not trust?  If we do not know the person, their functional logic, the drivers, then there is no way we are able to believe them and follow their leadership.  To be a leader means to generate true friendships from those we lead, to bridge the gap between out-of-work life and work-life.

A leader must be overt and should not lurk in the shadows; a smile once and while is not a personality, and is no way a replacement for one.  A slap on the back at the wrong time is a slap in the face.  Individual outgoing actions without an outgoing attitude breed distrust.

I hear feedback all the time from friends that work all over the world – people complaining about their bosses.  Once a while you will hear about a boss that is loved and they are only loved because they are seen as a person who cares.  This is the take home point everyone.  You have to be seen as someone who cares.

How do we fix this?

If you are an employee, I would not even try.  You would only end up hurting yourself.

If you are a manager, you need to think more about how you are perceived.  As you worked your way up the organization you were perceived as the hard-working and that is what put you where you are today.  Now that you are the leader of a team, you need to change the way the people you lead see you.  You need to become an honest friend and start genuinely investing yourself in your employees.  You have to become overt, share who you really are so that employees can start to see you and understand what drives you.  If you show your motivators, it will encourage the team to show theirs and drive them.  Motivation is an internal driving force and not an external one, just as trust is something that is internal and can never be imposed on someone.

Update: N.B.  This post is not about any one individual or organization and should not be interpreted as an assessment on an individual’s management style.  It is all a combination of theory an personal feeling.

I write this open letter to explain why it is that I have chosen to end my subscription at Tele2. It is also to educate those who are about to sign up with Tele2 so they know what to expect from point of sale to customer service.

I would have sent this email via an email service if only I was given an email address when I asked your customer service agent for it. I was instead told that even if I did successfully research the name of the person responsible for the customer service department, they would not read my email. I was offered a physical email address to send a penned letter too, but I have chosen this option instead.

A few weeks ago:

A few weeks ago I dropped off my phone for service at your Täby, Stockholm store. It was going to be sent to Anovo, a company that does your repairs for you. Once I dropped it off, I asked for a phone to loan from Tele2 as this was one of the sales gimmicks the Tele2 representative gave me when I purchased the phone. I remember being told that I should just bring the phone back to us if it was to break during the warranty period and Tele2 will give you a phone to loan. Of course there was no such option when I dropped by phone off.

Then it became very interesting. I was asked for my mobile phone number by the Tele2 representative so they could send me an SMS when my phone was available for pickup. I explained that I will not have a phone under this period as no replacement could be provided by Tele2 [I am only upset about this part because your salesman clearly lied just to sell a phone]. I asked if email could be used, and the answer was strongly no. The irony was the person was using the computer right in front of them to log all this information.

Once all this paperwork was done, I was given a tracking number whereby I could track the progress online on Anovo’s website – I did this avidly as having my phone available to me was very important and thus important to get back. I think this company really understands that it is an inconvenience to be away from your phone, and so makes it easy to do follow up.

A few days ago:

Once I could see that the service had been completed, I contacted Tele2 customer service to continue my follow up on the status of the shipment and to see if I could come and pick up the phone. Remember that email could not be used, and that the SMS being sent would never be received because I had no phone. I was calling to ask for a phone number to get in touch with the store so I could see if the phone had come in. I was actually told that there was no way to get in touch with the Täby Tel2 store. Of course this was not true – otherwise how could the store be in touch with the company.

It was at this point that I was told to write a letter, not email, to make a complaint. Since sending snail mail into a black hole is far less fun than posting an open letter on the Internet, I hope others get to read this and reconsider doing business with Tele2.

My take:

Remember that you are in the business of serving customers a phone service, and not just chasing another phone subscription. Rude customer service agents with quick and smart answers are not the best doormen of an organization. Poor self-serving processes breed open letters on the Internet.

I was contacted by SEST (The Stockholm English Speaking Theatre) and shown a they will be performing, and I wanted to share with my fellow Stockholm expats out there. Please share if you are going, and what you thought should you see it. SEST also has a Facebook fan page which I encourage you to Like UPDATE:  I was just advised that a new website was set up for SEST and can be found at

The Play:

SEST invites you to an evening of love, betrayal and chintz in David Mamet’s witty comedy Boston Marriage.

Set in the Boston area at the beginning of the 20th century, the play explores the relationship between Anna and Claire, two old friends and sometimes lovers and their Scottish maid Catherine who is fresh off the boat. Anna has just become the mistress to a wealthy old man and Claire returns to her house after a period of a§1bsence to reveal shocking news of her own…

Dripping with double entendres and word play we present you with a most tragic comedy, delivered through quick, witty Victorian-era dialogue.

Welcome!

The Details:

Dates: 20-23/5 2011 7pm and 26-29/5 2011 7pm
Tickets: tickster.com or email sest.company@gmail.com
Actors Kristina Leon, Helena Lewin and Ingela Lundh
Director Samuele Caldognetto
The play is performed in English

About SEST:

SEST was founded in 2010 by Samuele Caldognetto, Italian director, actor and dramatist educated in Milan, Kristina Leon, actor trained in London at the Central School of Speech and Drama and Ingela Lundh, actor also trained in London at East 15 Acting School.Our first production was ‘4.48 Psychosis’ by Sarah Kane, which was performed to critical acclaim at TeaterVerket in September 2010.

The company’s aim and desire is to produce a variety of distinguished and thought-provoking plays and to provide Stockholm with theatre of the highest standard in the English language. In so doing we also wish to contribute to international communication across cultures through the art of the theatre, one that is accessible to everyone. Our aim is to reach out to a wide audience of Swedes, native English Speakers and other nationalities where English is the second language.

Updated on 05-06-2011:  Updated to add the new website details for SEST.

Black Friday

Under the Bush Jr. administration gambling with the use of a credit card was outlawed,  but a number of online poker and casino companies continued a newly illegal practice of allowing Americans to use their credit cards to gamble.  Here is the new related to black Friday

Last week a number of poker rooms had their domain names seized, and the FBI issued arrest warrants for the CEOs of the companies and for a number of influential people who work within them.  No one knows what is going to happen in this industry.

Flashback:

I used to live in the United States and being a poor lad I headed home after working long hours at a job.  After walking the dog I usually sat down and played a free hand of poker at PokerStars, or played real money blackjack.  I always stayed with the card games, because it was those I could really control and enjoyed the passive crowd of people online rather than having them in my living room.  I was happy in that mode.  One hand on a cold bud, and the other on a warm money hungry mouse.

I have never gotten into online gambling in Sweden.  I play the lotto and wait for the “ingen vinst” at the cashier every time I turn in my ticket to see if I have won.  It is either that or trading in scratched lotto tickets.

I guess I feel for those who in the US are having their betting companies get pulled out from under them. I would have been upset if someone took that chance from me.  I would be annoyed if the chance for me to waste my money on a lottery card was removed by my government or if I wanted to play poker or casino in Sweden.  To the people who this has affected, I understand your pain and I watch with eager eyes to see if this is the end of a campaign against your version of an online game.

The site is very easy to use and it seems that people on the site are very interested in taking the work if offered to them.  This seems like a perfect solution for expatriate families like ours.

Step 1:

Visit greataupair.com and in the left menu, you can search for au pairs and nannies by location. In this case  I am looking at Sweden for an au pair, but it seems all countries have good lists.

There are other search features where you can narrow down how long you want people to be available for, or even what hours in the day.  It is this flexibility and honest listings that I found to be very attractive.

Step 2:

The listings are very clear and give a great overview of who the person is, and when they are available.  Take a look at this one below.

Step 3:

From there, you can find all information about the candidate, sign up for free, and contact them for work.

Hope this helps others look for a nanny or au pair.  Wish me luck too!

This begs the question – who’s next and could Sweden be next?  We sit in hair salons and pubs discussing “their” crisis, but could it happen to us?  Are we the next nation just looking to the other side of the room pretending not to see the visitor?  It would not be the first Northern European country to do so.

If we look at Portugal and Ireland there were warning signs.  Rising unemployment and a rising sovereign debt (debt that is taken from other countries, opposed to issuing government bonds).  Look at the numbers taken from Wikipedia and Eurostat.

Sweden:

Unemployment: 7.9% – Feb 2011
Sovereign Debt: As of June 30,2010 Sweden had a sovereign debt equivalent to 240% of it’s GDP.

Portugal:

Unemployment: 11.1% – Feb 2011
Sovereign Debt: As of June 30, 2010 Portugal had a sovereign debt equivalent to 201% of it’s GDP.

Unemployment compared:

So, I will ask the question again after having a look at these numbers.  Is Sweden on the list?

It just gets me to thinking that perhaps the Senate and the House of Representatives are not  currently what they are supposed to be or intended to be for; by the people for the people.  It seems to me that the modern day job of elected officials in these houses is to either set up or clear road blocks for the administration they either counter or defend.  It is like any two teams playing a field game of cricket or baseball where each side will get a chance to either field or bat.

It then begs the question of why we need these elected catchers and batters working in a completely different fashion to those who clearly understand the mandate and know-how to fix much of the foreign policy mess in the world.  It just frustrates me that we allow such an important decision making body to just spin their wheels just for the sake of setting up or bringing down boundaries to real progress.

I wish we could all just get on the same page, and agree that these elected mountain builders should follow in the footsteps of Gingrich and Palin and join the so-called journalists at Fox News and let productive decisions be made in the Senate and the House.

Encouragement:

I think it is easy to forget that it is possible to work for yourself, as long as you have the drive and the passion for what it is you enjoy doing.  Let’s face it – a person can only really look for employment for 3-4 hours a day maximum and if the other time in the day is used correctly, a business could be born.  In this case, it did not take capital – just a computer a free piece of software from the Internet.

I hope this post encourages others to explore working for yourselves as you arrive in Sweden.  If you already work for yourself, and have an idea to share, please let me know and I would be happy to blog about it.  I am like to see the ingenuity.

Keep it up Martin!